Ny månad. Nya vindar. Stora hjul i rullning. Jag förställer mig hur min dammiga mantel faller tungt till marken. Lystern i guldbroderierna har för länge sedan mattats av. Här och där saknas en pärla. Den har gjort sitt. Nu är det dags. Jag låter den falla.
Den stöter i marken med en duns. Jag darrar till. Nu står jag här avtäckt. Stadigt på en grund som är både rätt i tid och omständighet. Med en stark känsla av lugn. Rädsla, oro, och ångest får finnas till. Som ett tecken på stor förändring. Som ett tecken på mänsklighet.
På smått darriga ben. Med blankt putsade skor. Och med hjälp av det enda jag egentligen har. Andetaget. Tar jag steget ut. I det som förhoppningsvis är början på allt. Eller bara helt läsht.
Wish me luck!
Åh, vad roligt! Du ska se att allt löser sig till det bästa. Det enda man kan göra idag är det lilla man kan göra idag. Sen samma sak imorgon. Och i övermorgon. Och så småningom är man inne i nåt helt nytt. Lycka till! You´re gonna rock.
ReplyDeleteTACK Hannah! Det är så sant. Lite i taget bara. Iiiih. Tii ba på baa!
ReplyDeleteVad underbart det är, att stå i sanningen, stand on the line. Stå där, lugnt och stilla, ta ansvar för var man står, visa sig sårbar och öppen för världen, öppna upp sina armar och säga "använd mig till det jag är ämnad, vad nu!"
ReplyDeleteJag sa till mig själv igår "vad läskigt, nu är mitt hjärta on the line." Men sen sa själen "Your heart has always been right there on that line. Now you're just taking responsibility for it being there and doing something about it. Nothing is changed, just your attitude about what already is. It's not scary, it's powerful."
Lite så känns det för mig också. Skrämmande, men befriande. Jag är rädd för rädslan, men det kanske är ok. Den kanske inte bits.
Ja Sanna. Det är skrämmande men känns lugnt på samma gång. Jag tror inte rädslan försvinner. Den är ju en del av oss. Det är bara att gå igenom den. Som den där sången man sjöng på dagis..
ReplyDeleteÅh va fint din själ uttryckte sig! Kram fina soulsister!
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